Against Doctor’s Orders

I was supposed to start 100 mg of Clomid yesterday, but I decided that I would wait until today so that I could POAS again and make sure. I’m just so terrified of starting up again and damaging anything. So, this morning, I grabbed my T.arget brand HPT and let flow. BFN.

In theory, I should start Clomid now, right? I mean my doctor wants me to have started yesterday (though, in my defense of going against her recommendation I would have only been on day 4 of spotting yesterday, not 5, so I’m not TOO worried), but something is not right. I know I got a BFN, and that it’s SUPER common for me to ascribe pregnancy symptoms that aren’t there (or that could just be a side affect of the Clomid), but I would rather risk another month of no drugs and be wrong than not listen to my body and potentially ending a pregnancy that’s too soon to test for anyway (I just officially hit CD 29, but if I didn’t O until day 20, which is likely, the 2ww is still a week away).

I went to bed and woke up pretty nauseous, which normally I don’t pay much attention to, given my guts ability to make me writhe in pain, generally. However, I didn’t eat anything last night (save 1 tiny bite of the husby’s dessert, and I mean tiny) that would cause this kind of reaction.  Also, still spotting, but AF this is definitely not. Nips? Driving me crazy. Alternate from being painful to hypersensitive (not so much loving bras this week). And last night, I went to bed freezing, which is pretty standard, so I had on sweats and a hoodie, but ripped those off at like 2 am. When I woke up this morning at 7, I was completely soaked. My sheets were totally wet, and my head looked like I had just hopped out of the shower. even though the husby was completely comfortable.

So, like I said, I tested again, w/ the negative results. But tell me you’d be holding off too…I mean, I’m not crazy, right? I’m not going to bother w/ a blood test at the doctor’s, since if I’m wrong it will be pretty embarrassing to tell them that despite their medical advice, my crazy, hormonal, TTC brain thought I knew what was best. I’ll probably continue to POAS all next week, so, I guess we can only wait and see what emerges (if anything).


1 Comment

Filed under clomid, crazy, infertility

One response to “Against Doctor’s Orders

  1. Low Fat Lady

    I’m not sure what my advice would be. Go with your gut and do what you think is right. Is there anyone you could talk to at your dr’s office that might be sympathetic?

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