So, I normally do pretty well w/ the whole being around babies thing. I mean, in my community, it’s pretty hard to escape. My dearest friends all have babies, and it helps keep the aches at bay to be able to cuddle and love on the babies in my life with reckless abandon. I even do ok around the pregnants around me. I don’t mind talking breast feeding or mucus plugs or braxton hicks or any of those things. I just tell myself that my time is coming and to get as much information as I can.
But sometimes (and usually when I’m on hormones) I can’t take it. Today was one of those days, it seemed like everywhere I went there were babies and pregnant people. Including places that I would expect to be more “adult” type places. Not like bars or porn stores or anything, but at an outdoor play (in the freeeeeeeezing mountains at 8 PM) or just OUT at 10. I try to stay out of places I KNOW will trigger me, and I realize that sometimes it’s unavoidable (grocery store, mall, etc.).
I don’t know why I’m even writing this. Maybe because I want to know how to deal w/ the pain. Or figure out why it hurts to see/hear about something so amazing. I don’t like feeling envious, and I don’t know how to combat it.
I’m sure I’ll be ok in a week or two (I’m being realistic about the way my body reacts to Clomid), I hope so, or I’m going to have to move. Or at least become a hermit.