No. Just to confirm up front, I’m not pregnant, yet. But I will be testing this weekend, thanks to a missing Auntie, and the prospect of Provera. This raises a bit of a problem for me. Say my test is positive, what do I do? I don’t mean what do I do in the large, oh-my-god-we’re-having-a-baby! sense, but rather in the I’ve shared this whole process with people who have become important to me, and have been pretty involved in the process, by way of knowing what’s going on w/ ovulations and such, how do I tell them?
I’m concerned about telling people, fearing it’s too soon, that I haven’t been “trying long enough” that I don’t deserve it, yet. I don’t feel that way, since we’ve been trying for over 3 years (more on that story, later), but I’ve only been writing about it for 6 months, and only really consistently writing about it for a few weeks. So I don’t want to lose the relationships that have cultivated in writing about the process.
I’m also concerned with the idea of having to tell, too soon. Assuming I have a BFP, am I bound to tell the interwebs? Since I’ve miscarried a couple of times, I am VERY hesitant to say anything until we at least hear the heartbeat, which I think is fair, but it puts me in this position of having to write and interact as if it hasn’t happened yet. To those readers/bloggers who have been successful in conceiving, how did you deal with this? Did you post your pee stick on your blog and start counting from week 4? Or did you wait it out and write posts about things you hadn’t talked about, but still thought were important? Did you feel bittersweet?
All this talk sounds like I am pregnant, and I assure you, as far as I know, I am not, but I’ve felt very strongly lately that it was coming soon (yeah, I’m kind of a hippie-dippie spiritual psychicy type person), and want to be prepared for what that may mean. Advice is very welcome!