One of the more tragic aspects of PCOS is an erratic menstrual cycle. Since you don’t know when Auntie is coming to visit, you trick yourself into believing that your body is normal, and that you cycle every 28 days. This leads to what I call the “I’m Pregnant…I know it…crazies”.
At around day 28, I start getting antsy. I’m convinced my boobs are tender (they aren’t). I start getting nauseous. I’m EXHAUSTED. I have super-smell, where every scent is too strong, and I continually smell wet metal. I love to complain about these things, as the usual response is, “Well, maybe you’re pregnant.” Something about other people confirming my hopes really does it for me. Makes me feel a little less batshit, you know?
And then I start the peeing. I finally smartened up and bought a bunch of dollar store pregnancy tests, since I was tired of wasting so much money on Nos. I’ve managed to wean myself of this one, but for awhile, it was bad. I would take them every day, and always, “No.”
This got a lot better once I started BBT charting. Being able to see whether or not I ovulated let me know whether or not I had a chance of being pregnant, regardless of my symptoms. Unfortunately this turned into a whole different kind of crazy. I became obsessive about my temperature. I would wake up at 545, take my temperature and then obsess about what it could mean. I have had complete breakdowns over temperature drops. Like sobbing, on the floor, BREAKDOWNS. It’s a horrible cycle (heh). I would put so much stock into so-called “ovulatory” symptoms that it would be crushing when I was wrong.
I stopped that, as well. It was just too much for the crazy-making. I haven’t really been monitoring my ovulation that much, lately. Just tried to be consistent with the wonky-tonky. But, I am going in to the doctor on Wednesday, and we are going to have the Clomid talk (in case you don’t remember my crazies last time, go back a few posts). It was REALLY bad on 50 mg, but I didn’t ovulate, so I’m thinking she’ll up the dosage. (Let’s keep our fingers crossed on this one, shall we?) Anyway, I’m thinking that with the Clomid, I should really be monitoring my ovulation, so over the weekend I bought one of these bad boys:
I’m really hoping that being able to see if I’m nearing ovulation will help keep the crazies at bay (chances are good I’ll just become obsessive and do it like 14 times a day).
Any of my struggling sisters used one of these? Successes in predicting the O? Did it make you feel like a genius scientist?